Photo by Rick Harris

Funeral Director Barnett says funerals have become more personalized

By Greg Miller
STAR STAFF
gmiller@starhq.com

   Funerals have become more personalized, according to Jerry Barnett, funeral director, Hathaway-Percy Funeral Home.
   "Personalization is what we call it," Barnett said. "It's trying to make the funeral more about the person that's deceased. The way they do that is through the magnetic picture boards that we have. They can bring pictures of the person, and of the family and so forth, and display those during the visitation time and during the service. That allows people to reflect back.
   "If it's a man, they may have pictures of his school days when he played on the ball team, or they may have pictures from his military career when he was a soldier or in the Navy. They may have pictures of his work place, working with the kids at church, working with the Little League team or anything like that.
   "For ladies, they will oftentimes bring pictures of the family like on vacations, picnics or things like that. They will bring pictures of when they were young, even school pictures and big pictures.
   "Then they will do what we call a memorial table, where they will bring some personal items of the person, maybe his key ring, and if the lady liked to sew, they might bring some things that she has sewn, like a garment or a quilt. That's become rather popular."
   The funeral home furnishes the boards, tables, etc., for the personalization, Barnett said.
   The personalization service, Barnett said, can help those going through the grieving process. "They will bring their pictures here and put the boards together themselves. We've had a few families who have taken the board home to put it together and then bring it back here and we display it on an easel for them."
   Some families "make the board real dressed up, real neat. Then you'll have others who will bring so many snapshots and cram the board full to where they get one of everybody in there."
   Photos of grandchildren are popular items for the boards, Barnett said.
   Over the past year, Hathaway-Percy has taken on "what we call the 'memory packages,' which are the register books, the cards and the folders that families use during the visitation time of the funeral. We used to have one book, and everybody used the same book, but now we have 11 different books and it gives them a lot more to choose from. The cards are designed to where they stay with the same theme as the book, the same pictures and printing and so forth. That has worked out real well, too."
   Hathaway-Percy offers various services at no charge. Those services include taking chairs and register stands to the homes, providing coffee, pastries and ice, and a food book to register the food items that people bring.
   "We make it a point, as people come to visit, to greet them at the door, not just the family but the visitors. We want them to feel welcome. Some people have a stigma about going to a funeral home to visit, even during a visitation time or a funeral service.
   "But it seems to make a difference if there's someone there at the door to open the door for them and greet them, offers to take their coat and hang it up for them, and makes sure they get to the right place. The questions we're asked the most at night are 'Where is the register book?' and 'Where's the restroom?'
   "We go in and check on the family quite often, to see if they have any needs, if they're comfortable, if it's too hot or too cold. We put drinking water in there for them. We want them to be comfortable.
   "During the arrangement conference, we find out if they would prefer to sit in the chapel with the other people during the service, or if the family would rather sit together in the family room."
   Keeping the building clean, keeping the landscaping looking nice, keeping the cars clean and being nice to people when they come in are all important aspects of the services offered, Barnett said.
   For families whose loss is an infant less than one year old, the funeral home's Cherub Service furnishes the casket and service at no charge to the family.
   Cecil Eggers is Hathaway-Percy's other funeral director. Hathaway-Percy is currently training Don Friesland, L.D. Guinn and Robert Parks. Terry Cole is the office manager. Earline Blevins works on Saturdays.
   Hathaway-Percy Funeral Home is owned by Heritage Family Funeral Services, based in Elizabethton.
   For more information, call 543-5544.